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I am responsible for my lilfe

"The No Question Workshop taught me to internalize that I am responsible for my life experiences, rather than being a victim! It has made me realise that I must start ...

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...to pursue a passion

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"I decided to pursue a passion and a dream to set up my own business.  I have attended the No Question seminar today to meet other women like myself.  I ha...

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Coaching tips for everday life

Being coached by Bukky was an experience! The sessions were full of encouragement, laughter and good tips on how to manage life. They left me with a sense of 'I ...

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Desiree Simpson

I found the No Question! Workshop a real eye opener. I was made aware of how my thought patterns and certain patterns of behaviour have affected all different aspects of ...

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Pursuing my dream

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  "I decided to pursue a passion and a dream to set up my own business.  I have attended the No Question seminar today to meet other women like myself.  I ...

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bukkyolaleye (Bukky Olaleye) : Wish I had known this when I was employed http://t.co/XTtqhjXz

bensoutham (Ben Southam) : @bukkyolaleye hah I can't let the weather get me down, the city is too cool! lol literally! cool! ho ho ho =/

bukkyolaleye (Bukky Olaleye) : @bensoutham come back Ben, all is forgiven :) slightly warmer here....just

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Blog

The Gift of Time

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When was the last time you took the opportunity to examine the direction of your life? To ask questions such as: 'How productive or how happy am I' and 'What can I do differently'? This four session class is a gift you owe yourself; during the hour and a half session you will get to stop, consider, review and be energised as you make any necessary changes to improve your life. Change your thinking, change your results.

The sessions will provide you with a constructive framework with which to move forward and help you achieve your goals. You will attend with like minded people who are also commited to creating a more fulfilled life. Groups are kept small to ensure participation. You have a choice of attending Wednesday or Thursday evenings depending on your other commitments. Give yourself this precious gift, book today!

Please note places are limited.

http://www.eventbrite.com/event/1735640347

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Admit it, You're not fine

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This article by Mel Robbins is from a current issue of Success Magazine. I couldn't paraphrase it as you need to read it in its entirety. Read it, enjoy it, then do something! That's what I am going to do. How about you?

Your potential is limited by one thing: you. You only do what you feel like doing. You only do what’s comfortable. That’s why you don’t have what you want. And you are not alone.

In a recent U.S. survey conducted by The Conference Board, 55 percent of people were unsatisfied with their careers. That’s the highest level of dissatisfaction since the group began surveying business trends 23 years ago. I guarantee you, most of those people spent more time parked in front of the television or surfing the Web than looking for a new job today. We always do what’s easy; we do what feels comfortable, even when we are miserable.

At some point, everyone feels stuck and dissatisfied. Each one of us has issues we believe we cannot overcome. You can’t find love. You can’t start over. You can’t lose the weight. And because you feel hopeless to change, you give up. You say things are fine, you pretend it’s all good, but on the inside you know that you want something more.

Recently, I was sitting in the soaring nave of Harvard Memorial Church listening to the Rev. Peter Gomes. Gomes is a renowned theologian at Harvard University and has been awarded 36 honorary degrees. Were I to pick someone I believed to be immune from feeling stuck, I’d put money on Peter Gomes. But in that setting he revealed, “We’ve all grown tired of who we are. We long to become something more and to become who we were meant to be. That quest to become who you were meant to be is the purpose of your life on earth.

“I have grown tired of where I am,” he said. “I am tired of my small-mindedness. I am tired of my excuses. I am tired of who I am. I am tired of pretending that I have it all figured out. I want to become something more than who I am today. Who I am today, is not who I am meant to become. My quest is the same as yours. The question we all face is: What are you willing to shed to become who you were meant to become?”

Among all the brainiacs and overachievers filling the rows, there was a collective exhale. Gomes admitted he felt stuck, too, and allowed us all to drop the façade. We all long to become something more than who we are.

There is more in store for you than what’s going on right now. The problem is when you guesstimate the mental effort, the physical effort and the perceived consequences you’ll have to deal with, getting whatever it is you want seems impossible. That’s why you throw in the towel. That’s why you turn on the TV every evening instead of going to work on your dreams. You may be able to stop thinking about changing your life for a while, but the feeling that something’s missing will stick with you.

You want to know how to live up to your potential? Stop saying you are fine. Admit what you want to someone. And do the hard work to get it. I promise you, if you turn off the TV and you take the hard road, you will get what you want. If you do what feels uncomfortable, if you take the actions you don’t feel like taking, you can have everything you ever wanted. Your potential is within reach. You just don’t feel like reaching for it.

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Aaaaaargh!

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I put this on my Facebook status a while ago and immediately my friends were concerned. Then I explained that I was in a panic because I had just sent my book to the printers.

I don't think much about certain things that I do precisely because I think too much about most things. I think, and then I get paralysed with my own thoughts. Also I don't often leave room for other peoples’ opinions, whether negative or positive when I am thinking of doing something mega; I merely decide not to go ahead.

Well, the idea to publish my book' Plan Your Life' belongs in the ‘didn't think too much category.’ Never mind the fact that the process took almost two years from writing to publishing. Ok, I didn't say I didn't think at all....... the difference however is that unlike other times I did decide to go ahead.

As a result, 'aaaaargh' was the title of my ‘oh my gosh, what have I done, now the whole world will see the book and they will think its rubbish, now I have nowhere to hide, I will get bad reviews, only my family will buy it - if I force them.......’ internal tirade.

Obviously I am exaggerating a tad bit; it's not the whole wide world that will see the book……….but you know how irrational fears go.

So I have decided to think less – about publishing the book – and even less about the opinion of the whole wide world. I just did it.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhh!! The book is out!

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New Year, Busy You?

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Find below some tips from one of my favourite authors Valorie Burton, Life Coach on how to reclaim your life.

1. Shift your expectations.
Redefine success on a personal level. “All” for one woman is too much for another. You can have it all, but you don’t have to have it all at the same time. Learn to make schedule adjustments based on what most needs your attention rather than attempting to equally balance every activity. Get clear about what is a priority at this stage of your life and take a more relaxed approach to the rest.

2. Establish your non-negotiables.
Eating, sleeping, quality time with your spouse or children— some things on your schedule shouldn’t leave room for negotiation. When you allow these things to be squeezed out, the consequences can be devastating. Decide what is nonnegotiable for you. Then plan the rest of your life around it.

3. Ask for help.
In years of coaching women, I’ve noticed that too many try to go it alone. They don’t ask for help, either out of fear they won’t get it or that others won’t do what they want done as well as they do it. One of the keys to happiness is having a support system and sense of community. What do you need help with? Perhaps it’s the laundry or the cooking, a project at work or picking up the kids from school. Go through each of your to-do’s and ask, “Who could help me with this?”

4. Don’t be a maximizer.
Dr. Barry Schwartz, author of The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less, says the abundance of choice in today’s culture robs us of satisfaction. To free up time and mental energy, limit your choices throughout the day. Rather than perfecting every decision (what clothes to wear, what to eat, which gadget to buy), establish your minimum standard and then choose the first option that meets your standard. It’s called being a “satisficer” and it’s the opposite of being a “maximizer”—someone who agonizes over every decision to find the perfect choice.

5. Promise little, if anything at all.
Next time someone asks for something, be intentional about not creating pressure by promising what you cannot deliver. “I’ll do it by Friday morning” may be too much. “I’ll do it by next week” gives you wiggle room.

6. Create “fun goals.”
Positive emotion does more than make you happy. It actually expands your capacity to handle adversity, gives you energy and makes you physically healthier. Set “fun goals”—activities that exist for pure joy. Whether it’s a game you play, a fun hobby or an adventure you want to embark on, make sure your goals aren’t all serious. It’s the fun goals that just may give you the extra energy to reach the serious ones. Remember, change is a process, so don’t beat yourself up if you don’t reclaim your schedule all at once. Start small, but start now by practicing at least one of these principles this week. Over time, your thinking will shift and your everyday actions will follow.

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THINK BIG!

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Below is the philosophy of Dr Ben Carson, director of pediatric neurosurgery at Johns Hopkins Medical Institutions, on what he believes creates a successful and meaningful life.

The acronym of THINK BIG!

 

Talent and time. Recognize them as gifts.

Hope for good things and be honest.

Insight from people and good books.

Be Nice to all people.

Knowledge: Recognize it as the key to living.

 

Books: Read them actively.

In-depth learning skills: Develop them.

God. Everyone has their own beliefs.

When you THINK BIG, what does the “G” stand for in your life?

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